You Have

Marva Moody

 

You have…


It’s true what they say nobody hears anything after the man in white says, ‘You have’. Sitting on the brown padded examination table, with the scratchy sheet of paper that protects you from others, you hear nothing else. White noise parades around in the eardrums of a person not wanting to accept the words.
You have…


Almost instantaneous, the memories start to play. Nights filled with faceless partners. Varying in shapes and colors, each as nameless as the one before. Places are as numerous as the partners. Safety is lost, never sought. Pleasure is the only thing that matters.


You have…


The pinch of the narrow metal is the key that you’re on the right track. Soon the euphoria comes. A euphoria often shared with other pleasure seekers. The key is passed around like a not-so-kept secret, allowing access to any who choose to partake in the fun, combining blood and liquid euphoria biding them all for life, even after the bright euphoria fades to black.


You have…


The shock dulls a little. The memories stop. Your thoughts that have only sought out pleasure that pushed you night after night for euphoric releases are now silent. Sitting on the brown padded examination table that protects others from you, you hear the doctor reassure you that you can still have a nearly-normal life. With medication your life can be the same. Just now,


You have HIV.

 

Euphemism Campus Box 5555 Illinois State University Normal, IL 61790