I Wish that I Lived Next Door to Myself

Henry Hanson


I wish that I lived next door to myself,
For my house is too small for even an elf.
My double garage is too small for my stuff,
My car and my mower, my big ol’ dog Fluff.


My neighbor next door has a house that is great,
It takes up an acre and bedrooms are eight.
It’s four stories high and bathrooms abound,
And a tree in the middle from the top to the ground.


There’s ping-pong and bowling and more than one pool.
Whenever I see it, I just have to drool.
The grass on the lawn is as green as can be,
I could live very well if she paid me the fee.


The bedrooms are huge and the beds are quite plush,
The plants all around make them seem very lush.
The garage is quite huge and holds many cars,
All of them newer and nicer than ours.


Mercedes and Beamers to name just a few,
A Viper and Audi and Jaguar, too.
Next to them all sits my little Dodge Stratus,
It gets me around but has little status.


I dream and I wish for things meant for kings,
But I guess in the end, they’re just worldly things.
My neighbor comes home but she looks very tearful,
Well, I’d rather be here and be happy and cheerful.

Euphemism Campus Box 4240 Illinois State University, Normal, IL 61790-4240